"The world is a comedy to those who think; and a tragedy to those who feel."
~Horace Walpole

"This quote, among other notable variations of its theme, summarily describes how one's outlook on life, in general, is affected by the "ruling organ" that determines one's actions and responses. For as long as I've known myself, I've always tried to identify ironies and common themes in past experieces, so that every situation I observe or am involved in seems less serious than it may really be. Over time, that outlook has evolved (or devolved really) from joviality, to sarcasm, to cynicism- from good to bad to downright ugly and outright negative.

I find myself now floundering in unrelenting pessimism. But why? I thought the whole time I was thinking instead of feeling, after all. Ah... "I thought... I was thinking". Maybe that's the problem. True, that's more observation that explanation- but perhaps understanding the meaning behind the statement is the first step in identifying the core problem.

To be fair though, I've never identified myself as an outright optimist. I'd never thought though that my outlook could be so tainted by all that I've observed. Is the world spiralling into oblivion as quickly as it seems? Are my goals really that distant and unreachable? And is the future more uncertain now than it has ever been? Or am just channelling/concentrating a zeitgeist that pervades my entire generation?

Ironically, it amuses me that I've come full circle as far as my perception of my life, world and future. And ironically again- I'm not pleased with my present state of mind. I'd love to go back to the way I was- and I don't think that's very far- but I'm not sure if the way back comes from entirely within, or entirely without, or a little of both. Maybe there's one thing- just one thing- that needs to happen to catalyze the reversion.

Maybe I need to stop thinking about me.

It's just a theory, though. "