. one-hundred and sixty-seven (Haha, you suck!)

11/24/2009 07:51:00 PM

I expect to be respected when I give respect onto a certain individual. Especially if me and that individual are in some sort of relationship. I do not even understand why I am still on this shit. I am still with my ex who was before my ex who is not my ex anymore and he just pissed me off with something.

Naturally, when we first started dating, I was better off than him in the grades and education department... he used to tell me about his failings and I would try my best to encourage him to keep up the work and focus on what is most important. I never laughed at him, I never demeaned his learning abilities, I never talked shit, I never told him he was a failure.

So now his grades are doing really good, and his average is actually better than mine, due to my horrid work habits and attendance. He knows this. And today I vented on how I got back my assignment and got a 78% on it, how I went from 90s to 80s to high 70s and I was stressed about it...

His reaction you ask?
Caring?
Loving?
Encouraging?
Reassuring?
NO.

He replied with a "hahaa you suck."

Yes ladies and gents, those exact words.

So I snapped on him, and said how I NEVER did that to him when he was slipping in school, so I didn't believe I deserved that sort of treatment, and I did not appreciate it and I would like certain things in this relationship to be reciprocated. The phone call ended with tension, since we hung up from each other shortly after.

My friend often asks me why I always go back to him, and obviously there are things there that I enjoy, however he does certain things that make me just want to kill him, and never speak to him again. Like today. I already felt like shit, and he just rubbed it in and stomped on me with a steel toe boot.

Im just so angry. The blog was the only thing I could turn to.

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